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Click on the heading to go straight to the article you want Kids in the news – Bullying On the very day that I heard about the school initiative to teach optimism at school, a disturbing report about bullying made headlines in our newspapers. A young man of 18 has won a large compensation payment because the teachers at his school failed in their duty of care when he was a small boy. A photo of him as a six year old when bullying began, shows him as a smiling, delightful child. Despite the fact that his mother reported bullying incidents that included breaking his teeth, whipping him with a branch and trying to strangle him until he fell unconscious, teachers took no action. The mother was told that “bullying builds character.” It may have built character in the bully – bullying characteristics. For the victim it made school a scary place and other kids nasty, untrustworthy people. He left school in year 7 because he had no friends and was unable to cope. The judge deemed that he is so psychologically damaged that he will never be able to work, or have a meaningful relationship. He has been awarded weekly payments for life. This case has big implications for the education department and teachers everywhere. An apology has been made by the education department to the victim, but there are questions that will worry parents.
On the right-hand side of the home page of my e-zine, you will see a link to articles on bullying, written by experts Wendy Nichols and Robyn Collins. There is a link from their three articles to their E-book. It helps parents take appropriate action when they think their child is being bullied. Read the articles today. __________________________________________________________________________ Radio listening is an activity I really enjoy. I listen as I prepare food or wash the dishes; I listen as I drive to town; I listen while I’m dusting and sweeping. I hear interesting snippets of information to follow up when I have time, and sometimes I’m lucky enough to hear whole programs. I enjoy TV too, particularly current affairs and documentaries but with radio one can let the imagination run. The mind isn’t constrained by the images on a screen. I caught an interesting radio interview at the weekend with lots of scope for mind pictures. A man was being interviewed about his house, why he chose this house, what he’d done to it since buying it and what plans he had for it in the future. He took the interviewer up and down stairs as they talked and out into the garden. The house, built in the 1880’s is in London and had been in a state of dilapidation when purchased, with leaky roof, missing floor boards and mouldy walls but great potential. I could picture it having lived for a couple of months in a house built in 1702 that suffered from the same features. The 1880’s house is now a modern delight inside while retaining the original external character. What really fascinated me were the reasons the owner gave for choosing some of the décor. He began the project while a bachelor, but chose decorations and furnishings that would make an impact on the minds of his future children. A long-piled carpet he thought, would fascinate a baby crawling over its surface. The brightness of stainless steel door handles would attract small hands, the simple metal lamp stand with ornate pink shade, would symbolise both masculine and feminine partners in the home. He hoped this home would form a permanent part of his children’s childhood memories. He has a partner now and two children. The tour included sounds of children in the background and references to his son’s dinky bike that is constantly in use as the child rides from room to room. The owner sees the home as one that will always grow and change. This man has put a lot of thought into making a home for a family but outdoors was a different story. The very small garden is all concreted over. The feature is a textured wall with some bamboo against it, and one tree in a pot. London gardens are often small and the weather often bad, but I have no doubt that Bev Boorer, who writes for this e-zine each month, could transform that small space into a child’s delight and add gardening activities for the child too. If you live in a flat or unit, take a look at your back yard. Is it barren or is at a welcoming space alive with colour and greenery? Do you encourage your child to be part of the gardening team? __________________________________________________________________________ Have you read the poem Said Hanrahan (PJ Hartigan)? It is an old poem but it is also in a 1999 book of verse for kids, Waltzing Matilda Meets Lazy Jack. Whatever the circumstance, poor Hanrahan thought everyone was doomed. Kids laugh when they hear it. My Mother used to recite a similar poem about people who kept telling a man, “My word you do look ill”. He felt worse and worse until at the end of the poem, he met someone who told him how fine and well he looked. His step brightened and suddenly his day was turned around. Negative psychology has an unfortunate effect on everyone. If we tell our children they are bad, or hopeless or unhappy, they begin to believe it. The more they hear it, the faster they become hopeless and bad and sad. Positive psychology works too. If we tell someone they are doing well, they respond well. I was interested to hear that Geelong Grammar School in Victoria, is planning ways to teach students to have an optimistic outlook on life. The program will be developed over a period of time with the staff having special training next January. The program will use the strengths that children have, such as kindness, a sense of fairness, generosity, as well as using their interests. The program will be incorporated into each area of the curriculum. Sporting facilities combined with medical facilities will continue to be used to help children maintain physical well being and to overcome stress that is very much a part of life for young people today. I look forward to hearing more about it. It is easy to overlook a child’s strengths especially as parents have very different agendas from their children. Children are egocentric and before the sage of seven will act to satisfy their own needs and feelings rather than taking other people’s wishes and feeling into account. It is important, however that we tell children how others are feeling and encourage positive interactions with others. A friend tells me that she encourages her twelve year old son to do something unasked for every day. It might be helping a younger child at school or giving up his seat in a bus, or going a message for a neighbour. What a good idea for adults to follow too. It is up to us to help our children develop kindness skills. If we have a positive outlook on life and look for positive ways to solve problems, our children will have good role models to follow. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Keeping in touch with grandparents It is wonderful to live near grandchildren so one can see them develop and be part of their lives. It is especially wonderful to watch a grandchild grow from babyhood to adult. My Mother was able to do this with my children and my brother’s children but my sister lived overseas. Despite living in a village with no telephones, no postal service, and no modern transport, my sister wrote almost weekly to our Mother - long detailed letters full of the activities and sayings of the children. Whenever possible she sent a batch of drawings that the children had done especially for their grandmother. Every few years Mum had saved enough to enable her to visit them and would bring back photos and mementos that took their place beside all the little things her Australian grandchildren had made for her. Every week my Mother also wrote to my sister. At birthdays and special times, individual letters went to the four children. As a result, she knew them well. The children knew their grandmother well too and their cousins, because Mum told them news of our families here. These days communication is so much easier. My extended family is scattered far and wide both within Australia and across the world but it is important for each branch to keep in touch.We use telephone, email and letters, as well as dropping in to visit those in the same town. I think of the early settlers who came across the world to live here. Many never had contact with their families again. And if they did, it was many months before a ship brought letters sometimes with tragic news. My forebears came from the UK and my husbands from the US. As far as we know they settled in Australia to make a better life for themselves and their families but they were unable in keep in touch with their roots. Grandparents have an important role in the lives of their grandchildren. They can provide love, understanding, and support in many ways that does not involve money. They often support busy working parents by
Both the children and the grandparents miss out on something special if they are denied a relationship. The Family Law Court recognises this and can arrange access for grandparents where divorce has separated the family Do you involve your children in their grandparent’s lives? ______________________________________________________________________________________ Absent family members are important Family members can be scattered far and wide temporarily or permanently. In today’s world, business people may have overseas jobs for months at a time such as
There are also families divided because of migration or divorce. Even though parents may live in the same town, regular contact between children and other family members may be difficult or infrequent. Extended family is also often scattered. These absent people should still be part of a child’s life. What can parents do to include them? Suggestions are:
As soon as a child can grasp a crayon and make marks on paper, they can make a card or a small picture for those they know and love. Help your child to do something for an absent family member today. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Kids in the news – Sexual abuse Australia has been shocked by a report that details sexual abuse in Indigenous communities, especially in the Northern Territory. The Prime Minister proposed unprecedented government action to start within days. The form that action will take is stirring up a great deal of controversy. Every one agrees there must be action but Indigenous people should have been consulted and be part of the planning and the action itself. It is essential that the Elders in communities are consulted, informed and respected. This has not been done as the Prime Minister called a press conference to announce the measures. Many people are in shock. Mick Dodson, an Indigenous leader of National importance, made a speech in 2003 at a national conference about the same matters and called for urgent action. The government did nothing and in fact funding to significant programs was cut. Now, two days after the release of this new report, the Prime minister has announced a ‘state of emergency’. What is the difference now? Why was Mick Dodson’s report ignored? Many people are sceptical. It is now only a few months till the national elections. Already troops and police are on their way to the 60 communities to implement the regulations.
Problems in Indigenous communities are related to many things especially poverty, poor health, low employment, poor education standards, low self esteem, geographical isolation and drug and alcohol abuse. These factors are themselves inter-related and have been the result of government inaction and inappropriate. At first glance government tools seem warranted, though severe. However: implementation will be difficult. Police often have poor relations with Indigenous people. There are rumours that women have already fled to the desert in fear. No one wants human rights to be violated and it is often non-indigenous people who have carried out the abuse. How would the majority of parents in the rest of society tolerate the mandatory inspection of their children for sexual abuse? Many Indigenous people will fear that a new situation similar to The Stolen Generations could begin again. A different report has also just been released but has received no attention in the media. It is called 'Success Stories in Indigenous Health'. You can find it at http://www.antar.org.au/success) It is worth spending some time on the site to read about how the community at Yuendumu turned around the petrol sniffing problem and began a youth success program. Health services with trained Indigenous workers in other communities are also working well where funding has been adequate. There is an urgent need for
If government does not support, fund, encourage and implement these positive services, serious problems will escalate. We haven’t heard anything about long term government program plans. The Prime Minister often criticises other parties for what he calls ‘knee jerk reactions’. It seems that he is the one doing it this time. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I have been reading about the amount of organization in children’s lives nowadays and the desirability of kids to have free time. The fact that small kids go to day care was mentioned, and I understood that the writer felt that child care is organized time. I cannot agree. All good day care programs let children play freely for most of the day. There are routines such as toileting, snacks, meals, story and music time, but it is a fact that children, even babies, thrive on routines like those I mention. They like to have predictable elements in their day. In a Child Care situation, more thought goes into planning the environment and providing stimulating, fun activities, than in most normal homes. It is extremely rare for children in childcare to look or feel bored. There is always something they can do, look at, listen to or talk about. They can play alone or with their peers. Children are not pressured to learn or achieve goals. The staff is not concentrating on teaching the children all day, any more than parents are teaching their children. Teaching and learning are natural part a of the play activities provided. I do agree that some children have their lives organized to the ninth degree, however. This seems to happen when children are old enough to take after school classes. Often it is the children who pressure parents to be allowed to play in after school teams, and join hobby groups. There are many different types of activities available and can be a great way for children to develop responsibility, a positive attitude to life and social and life skills. Kids can choose from groups such as
Parents often restrict these activities because of the cost involved but the number of commitments should also be considered. It is better to do a couple of activities in some depth than flit from one hobby to another. The physical and mental affect on the child should also be taken into account. Having a number of commitments is good for teenage kids. When they have lots of unstructured time on their hands, they look for fun ways to avoid boredom. One only has to read the paper or listen to the news to hear of teens in trouble in cars, with drugs, bullying, break and enter and vandalism. Part time jobs are good for the older age group also. At work kids gain experience, develop responsible attitudes, and increase their knowledge about finances. Too much time and not enough suitable activities are just as bad as too little free time. Finding the balance should be a joint decision between parents and children. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Occasionally we hear in the news of a babysitter who has been a disaster for a family. In the worst cases a baby or toddler has been injured, abducted or murdered. One cannot be too careful when finding someone to care for our children. When I was at school, some of the girls in my class had regular babysitting jobs, and it was a recognized way to earn some money. I am sure that teenagers still earn money in this way but most parents are now aware of the kind of things that can go wrong and want quite a lot of information before they will feel they can trust a babysitter. Trust is essential and only someone you feel is fully responsible, can be trusted with your child or children. If you do not know the person who will babysit, or their family, make sure you get references and follow up on these. Reading a reference isn’t enough, you want to get feedback from someone you trust who has used this babysitter. Here are some hints.
When you find a babysitter you trust, show the sitter consideration by coming home at the agreed time, paying well, making their time in the home agreeable and making the sitter feel safe and valued. A regular babysitter is a valuable asset to a family. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Did you know that literacy really begins with listening to stories? Every parent tells stories to their baby without knowing it. Now that is clever. How is it done? As you bend over baby at routine times such as nappy changing, bath time and feeding time, you talk about his smile, his little toes, his kicking, his family etc. These are little stories. Baby concentrates on your face and responds by making sounds. Baby is watching and listening and these are the first steps to literacy. In the first year of life it is wonderful to introduce babies to books. They may be thick cardboard or fabric or even plastic. But keep on telling stories to baby too. Tell stories about what you are doing, describing actions and events. For example ‘Here goes Janara into the bath. Kick those little feet. Listen to the water, swish, swish.’ As baby grows into a toddler, tell stories about the day. ‘Today Janara went to the park. Janara climbed on the swing and it went up and down, up and down. We saw the ducks in the pond too.’ A toddler’s toys are also fun to tell stories about. A story is a little game. Teddy can hide, go walking, go to sleep, jump, climb and fall down and be kissed better. Farm animals can make appropriate sounds, walk up hills, drink, dig holes, get frightened by loud noises and run away. The small stories are only limited by your imagination. Soon you’ll find that the toddler is telling you what will happen next. Memory is part of literacy too so your stories can help your child to remember what happened. Children like repetition so repeating a story is a good idea. Nursery rhymes are a great source of stories too. Use toys to show Little Miss Muffet and the spider, or Jack and Jill getting a bucket of water. Add to the rhyme by telling what Jack and Jill’s Mum wanted the water for or what Miss Muffet’s Mum did about the spider. Are you telling stories to your children? Are you stimulating their imaginations? Get started today. It is so much fun and will help your child develop language skills that lead to literacy. For more tips vist my special storytelling website at www.helenevans-storyteller.com-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Shaking a baby can have dire consequences yet this is still not realised by many parents. Men are often the guilty ones. They know that it is unacceptsable to strike a baby but think that a shaking will not cause harm. However, one in five babies dies from a severe shaking and those who survive may have permanent brain damage caused by the brain moving around inside the skull. So far this year in Sydney alone every week more than two cases of injury in which shaking was suspected, have been reported to authorities by hospitals. Shaking is usually the result of frustration when a baby cries constantly or for prolonged periods. Parents, carers and babysitters can become frustrated especially when tired or stressed. There is help available. Baby Health centres, hospitals, DoCs, Nursing Mothers’ Association, Lifeline, doctors, and pharmacies will all be able to put you in touch with someone who can help you. If you know someone who needs help, who is frustrated, tired, feeling helpless or hopeless, or angry, find out about local services and tell your friend. Some hospitals are developing strategies to help, such as new parents viewing mandatory DVD’s before taking their baby home after birth. We still have a long way to go in educating men about baby and child care. There are never many young men who choose child care as a career and at school level little if anything is taught about it. Teenage girls are sometimes given dolls that cry to cope with, and must record what they did. The same thing would be advantageous for boys in a course about baby needs and stages of development. They are never too young to find out that babies always need tender, loving care and that shaking does not solve problems. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Every person needs their own personal space. This space may be a place to keep treasured objects or a place to conduct a hobby where their interests won’t conflict with those of others in the family. It may just be a space in which one can go to be alone to think. Nowadays children, and especially teenagers, have their own bedrooms where they have a lot of control over how their room looks and what they can do in there. Arguments and general stress occur more if all the children are crowded together. Parents are more stressed if there is no quiet space away from the children. When my children were very young, it was rare for me to get any time away from them except in the bathroom and even then someone would frequently be knocking on the door to ask me for help or to tell me something important. Thinking back to my own childhood, I was lucky because we had a tree in the backyard. I could climb high into the branches and stay there thinking, imagining, solving problems and looking at the beauties of nature while at the same time I was breathing in fresh air and getting exercise. That tree was the most important space in my young life up until I was twelve years old. The plumber said it would have to come down then, because the sewerage was being connected and the roots would be bound to get into the pipes. I mourned the loss of the tree for years. At the end of that year, however, I was given a bike that partly took the tree’s place. When stressed, away I’d go on my bike, pedalling up hills as fast as I could, until my frustration or anger was exhausted. One of my jobs was to cut the wood for the chip bath-heater and the fire. I liked chopping the wood. I also found chopping wood was a good way to let off steam if I was feeling cross. Children today still need spaces of their own and places and activities where they can deal with stress calmly. Cubby houses, tents, trees, bushes, a place in the shed are all potential spaces where a child can have time alone. Bikes, running, swimming, walking, hiking, gardening and libraries are good places for working off stress or for calming down too. Remember to claim for yourself a quiet place too. One that doesn’t have to be shared with a partner however well you get on together. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I was interested in news of a study that has been done on the amount of sleep parents of new babies get. On an average, a new mother gets only 3 ½ hours of sleep a night. Fathers also get very little. The study is interesting to me because it not only looked at mothers today, but also mothers who had babies in the 1960’s when I had my babies. The study showed that parents back then had almost twice as much sleep as parents today. Why is that so? The reason seems to be the widespread use now of baby monitors. Parents feel their baby is safer, more unlikely to die of SIDS if the monitor is in the room. Mothers in particular develop the ability to sleep very lightly and wake if there is any disturbance or sound from baby and go to check. However, the good news is that modern fathers share the burden of getting up to attend to babies and to the other children in a family. My second child was very tiny and had cystic fibrosis that was not diagnosed till he was 10 months old. Until then, he was fed every three hours night and day. I’d never have managed if my husband had not been able to give a couple of the feeds every night. All through my children’s early years, though, I was the one who woke when they called and I’d patter out to attend to them. The three children never woke at the same time of course, so I’d be up three times in the night. Luckily I always fell asleep immediately I got back to bed, but if they were sick, I’d be up and down most of the night and felt like a wet rag in the morning. The survey also looked at the time taken to get a baby to sleep and they take 33 minutes to get to sleep now, compared with only 22 minutes back then. People now tend to nurse baby until he/she is asleep while before, baby was popped into the cot and left alone to settle. I guess parents just have to adjust to being constantly tired. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Stress has been in the news again because students in year 12 have begun their final school exams. However it is not only those young people who suffer from stress. A study has shown that children in years one, two and three often feel stressed. For these younger children, stress is usually about social issues rather than academic tests. Stress might occur because the child
The study showed that 40% of students worry too much, while a third get very nervous or depressed. A depressed child may
Children need support in social and emotional development both at school and at home. These aspects should be included in all areas of learning. Healthy food, exercise, regular communication and problem solving discussions, and mentoring in academic or other interests will help to keep stress levels low in any family. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Many older citizens believe that today’s children show no respect for the older generation or for authority. Children of our modern age are
But what is meant by ‘showing respect’? Does it mean unconditional obedience? Does it mean giving up the right to hold a different opinion to one’s parents? Does it mean accepting direction without discussion or argument? Does it mean that people in authority should make all the rules regardless of the thoughts and feelings of children and other young people? My feeling is that this approach will only lead to trouble and in fact, disrespect. Respect must be a mutual obligation and should be fostered within the family. Children need to respect their parents ideas and wishes, but adults need also to respect children. As children grow in confidence and independence, they form particular likes and dislikes. Their opinions are the result of many factors in their lives. Open discussions can reveal how your child’s mind is forming for example, why they do certain things and why they consider adults act unfairly at times. Consequences should be discussed. Try to discipline by choosing consequences that are appropriate for your child’s behaviour, but not too harsh. Children often accept a consequence or punishment better if they have helped to decide on it. Children of eight years can certainly do this. Siblings also need to respect each other. It is natural for them to have disagreements, especially as within a family children often have very different personalities. Learning to deal with these differences within a family with good humour and tolerance will help children to cope well in the wider community. Treating family members with respect includes
We should explain our reasons for rules, values and beliefs so our children will learn in turn to explain theirs and thus reduce generational differences and tensions. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Once again news reports have focused on sad, terrible things that have happened to children. The death or injury of a child is always sad but when it is the result of murder or neglect it seems even worse. What kind of desperation did a parent face that lead to the murder of a two year old boy? How did a seven year old girl starve to death? People naturally look for someone to blame as they think of actions that could have been taken to prevent these sad results. We are fortunate to have a designated government department to help children and families in crisis. Many countries don’t have such services. However, there is a gap between the reporting of a situation, assessment of the help needed, and implementation of help. Sometimes this gap is fatal. We all need to be watchful. It is better to be over conscientious in reporting problems to the authorities rather than wait and see if things improve. Department personnel need new procedures to follow that will close the gaps in the present system. It is reported that more than a hundred children die each year despite the fact that DOCS knows some details of the families involved. This is not acceptable. Children should not be removed from their family unless they are at real risk of harm and this is no doubt difficult to determine. Older children pose different problems from the very young. There has been much criticism of the fact that a thirteen year old has been left to live alone without sufficient support following the death of her father. She evidently has not wanted to move. Cases such as this need individual assessment. Some thirteen year olds take on family responsibilities such as caring for siblings or parents with disabilities, such as multiple sclerosis. Children can do amazing things but need support, especially if their responsibility will be ongoing. Hopefully, this case will be resolved in a way that will allow the girl to make choices instead of having decisions thrust upon her. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Every family, every school, even every organisation develops traditions. In out society, Christmas traditions have been all around us during December even if our family is not Christian. We have seen images that we all associate with Christmas in our towns and shops, in our schools, and on our TV stations. It is interesting how family traditions grow and change. When I was a child, we didn’t have a Christmas tree, but we decorated the room with streamers that hung over the dining room table. There was always great excitement when the box containing the decorations came out of storage. On Christmas Eve we went to sleep with a pillowslip attached to the end of the bed, so that Santa would know where to leave the gifts. On Christmas morning after the excitement of presents, we helped our Mother to make a boiled date pudding. Dinner was served in the middle of the day and consisted of baked vegetables and chicken, the latter usually provided by Mum’s cousin, a farmer. Chicken was a once-a-year treat. The first course was followed by the hot date pudding, custard and jelly. We had no refrigerator so ice cream was not available. After I married, my husband and I began new traditions while maintaining some of the old ones. In our new tradition we always had a tree. Some of those original decorations are still used each year and presents go under the tree. My Mother-in-law made traditional plum pudding for us and delicious fruit salad and I keep up these traditions. Instead of baked vegetables, I prepare fried rice and gado-gado, (salad with peanut sauce). My daughter’s traditions are now established too. She includes mince pies and shortbread, borrowed from her interest in Germany and England. Her children enjoy Advent Calendars prior to Christmas. It will be interesting to see how the food in my son’s family will change as my daughter-in-law adjusts the traditions to include her Indian-Fijian background. Of course there are many traditions associated with family life that have nothing to do with Christmas. Many people have holiday traditions, visiting the same places each year. Other traditions may relate to clothing, travelling, birthdays, games, sport, crafts, pets, music, religion, in fact any aspect of culture that is important to individuals and families. From birth we like routines as part of our security. As the New Year starts, it is a good time to reflect and think about the directions we intend to take in the coming year, and about the traditions that we value in our lives. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- At a time when people tend to think that traditional values have all but disappeared, I was interested to read that from a survey done by YouthSCAN of 600 young people, that the number of young people who smoke cigarettes or marijuana, has dropped. The number of teens who engage in sex before the age of 16 has also dropped. Members of the Youth Advisory Council say that young people are very aware of the dangers of drugs now and make informed decisions. There is no doubt that informed kids can take better control of their lives than those who don’t know facts. Education is a key factor in empowering young people to say 'no' to risky behaviour. The information must be available at school, at home and in the community. Open discussions should be encouraged. Linda Burney, NSW Minister for Youth, says that young people have more pressure on them than any other generation and she has been impressed with young people across the state. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Every child will run into problems at school at some time and need parental support. There is nothing worse for a parent than to feel their child is being picked on or is unfairly treated and this is particularly important when a child first starts school. Sometimes it is other children who bully or tease, sometimes it is the teacher who seems to be the cause of a child’s unhappiness. It may even be the system itself. Children are so very different from each other and at school there are so many rules that every child must follow. One of the biggest problems children have to face is that rules so often say DON’T. If the rules are put in positive terms children cope better. ‘Please walk on the cement,’ will have a higher rate of success amongst the children than ‘Don’t run on the cement.’ As well as rules, there are expectations. Children, parents and teachers are likely to have different goals from each other for the same children. At some schools, the main goal might be that a high percentage of students gain excellent academic results. At other schools sporting prowess is number one. These school goals should be considered when choosing a school for your child and if the children within one family have very different abilities, they may well thrive at different schools. Bullying continues to be the worst problem for children. Parent advocacy doesn’t always work. Teachers don’t always see what is happening and bullies are cunning. Sometimes the bullying occurs after school and children who try to ignore it may become stressed or depressed. Going to school can become a nightmare. Always check that your child’s school has an anti-bullying policy. However, a policy is not any use if it isn’t continually being monitored. Principals sometimes continue to refuse to accept that bullying does take place in their school. Discuss options with your children so that they know what they can do. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Politicians have been out in the community observing and researching our education needs for the twenty first century. I heard Maxine McKew speaking on radio about integrated programs she has seen in action in South Australia. She was impressed by the dedication of staff to programs designed to help young people develop parenting skills. Programs of early intervention to promote language and build confidence in parents and children who have missed out on opportunities, also impressed her. I heard Deborah Brennan speaking about regulations affecting early childhood centres. She is a social policy researcher. Regulations vary from state to state, but currently in NSW centres, five babies need only one carer and that carer need not have qualifications. This is not good enough but the industry resisted the introduction of a change to five carers for four babies because of fear that increased costs would be too great. In 2000 when ABC Learning was floated on the Stock Exchange, there were a number of corporate centres but these have all been bought out by ABC so removing competition. Deborah Brennen feels that Government needs to look at this situation. Currently almost 50% of Australian centres are controlled by ABC Learning and in countries like the UK and USA only 2% is controlled in this way. Parents must be able to shop around. They like to have community centres that reflect the needs of the local population and the wishes of parents and this is lost when almost all centresare under the umbrella of one big corporation working for profit. Big is not always best for our kids. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Helping kids with special needs I subscribe to several newsletters for writers. Sometimes I just delete them because of lack of time. Yesterday I read the current issue of a newsletter that I hadn’t bothered with for some time. I discovered that the writer’s granddaughter has Williams Syndrome. The child’s story has recently appeared in some media stories in an effort to raise money so that this charming three year old can have a dog trained to detect and give prior warning of her massive and constant epileptic seizures. This will not only help the child but her whole family. Media headlines are often about sensational events but TV and written print can make us aware of how we can each do some small thing to help others. If you are reading this, you are interested in the welfare of children. Here is a link to Tara’s story www.cheryl-wright.com/Tara . People from as far away as Canada are helping. Perhaps you would like to help too. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Every section of the community wanted something from the recent Federal budget and no group is more worthy that people with disabilities. While this section hasn’t been ignored, funding is still much less than people hoped. One of the groups that rarely wins, is the group of people with language disorders. The report I heard said that in the UK and the US, a great deal is done to help people with language disorders while almost nothing is done in Australia. Communication is a vital ability yet children with a disorder may wait years for any diagnosis and help. People with primary language disorder may be
Children with this type of delay need speech therapy, and other kinds of intervention every day if they are to have the chance of a normal life. Waiting years for help just isn’t good enough. Without communication skills, social and emotional development is badly affected. An adult who cannot communicate effectively, has almost no chance of employment so the economic situation to the community as a whole is affected. Children with this type of delay need speech therapy, and other kinds of intervention every day if they are to have the chance of a normal life. Waiting years for help just isn’t good enough. Without communication skills, social and emotional development is badly affected. An adult who cannot communicate effectively, has almost no chance of employment so the economic situation to the community as a whole is affected. By two years of age, a toddler should be combining words in a way that is meaningful and understandable to others. If help is not available until age five, the problems are likely to persist through life. These children
In Brisbane there is one school, Glenleighden School Fig Tree Pocket, where children can get the intensive therapy they need. Where is the help for other children? Come on Australia, catch up for all the children who need special help. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ ABC online has just begun a new initiative to bring specialist music teachers and programs to children everywhere in Australia. At the moment three out of four children in Government Primary schools have no music teacher. This new program will enable children to be involved in music, and their teachers will learn alongside them. Teacher support materials are sent out ahead of the programs. The range of programs includes singing, dancing, drama, instrument donation, school workshops, school holiday workshops, performances and community involvement. Studies have shown that children who learn music and participate regularly in creative arts, develop social, emotional and cognitive skills more readily than those who miss out on these opportunities. Perhaps your children’s schools have suitable music programs in place, if not refer your school to www.songroom.org.au to sign up the school. It sounds like an opportunity not to be missed. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Doctors and health people tell us that hand washing is one of the very best ways to prevent infections from spreading. When visiting someone in hospital one must wash hands before approaching the patient. Hand washing is the most important procedure for the medical staff too. It is essential that nurses and doctors wash hands between patients and between every procedure. In some hospitals there is an alcohol based substance to rub on the hands instead of soap and water. Often there is no staff present to remind visitors to wash, so be sure you do it. Although some germs are more likely to come from hospitals, many more begin in the home and community. Therefore it is essential that we all learn to wash our hands and never neglect the procedure. Hepatitis has several forms and is a serious illness. The form of staphylococcus aureus know as MRSA is extremely difficult to cure and does not have to come from hospital. It can live on the skin and be passed from person to person. We all think we know how to wash hands but do we really? I for one don’t usually wash for long enough. I am tying to reform myself. The guidelines say we should wash for at least 15 seconds. Here are some tips:
It isn’t always possible to wash in warm water. Cold water is better than none and a short wash is much better than no washing. Remember that germs are everywhere. Not all germs are bad, but to prevent infections we need to be aware of the germy places we have touched before we prepare food. Some of the worst infections such as gastroenteritis and diarrhoea begin through eating food infected during handling. Always wash hands after-
You will think of other times when you should wash. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- DON’T TELL ME ALL ABOUT IT – JUST READ IT! by Dr Virginia Lowe. Thus my daughter complained at two as I picked up a new library book and started talking about the pictures. Many people choose not to read the actual words of a book until the child is speaking themselves. Instead they play the labelling game, even up until age two. “Look at the dog”, “Can you find the shoe?” “Where is that bird going?” This is good fun too of course, and the child is learning, and using their language ability, as the parents constantly increase the complexity of their questions in line with the child’s growing ability. But think about actually reading the words as well. Babies won’t understand them, but nor do they understand the everyday talk around them. However they are learning new words constantly long before they can talk. You may find that reading the words is more interesting than just talking about the pictures, and your child will too. One who is used to hearing the story rather than just playing the labelling game, will chase you around the house begging for another book, and listen to as many as you are prepared to read. They are hearing new and extended language in unusual patterns. When you read aloud the words are more emphasised and clearer, the inflection more pronounced – literary language sounds quite different to ordinary conversation. Once the child does begin to talk, they can play with the language itself. The quotes or partial quotes from familiar stories extend their vocabulary and sentence structure, surprising you with turns of phrase outside your “family talk” – “Where are we going this nice fine day?” Our daughter loved an unusual word – “fortnight” “mackintosh” “camomile tea” “tippet” – she would say it, chant it, sing it, roll it around on her tongue. It was the sound and the newness of the word she valued rather than its meaning, which she sometimes requested after days or weeks of playing with it. When stories are simplified by either parent or publisher this delight in language is sacrificed. There will be an interest in language as such. Ralph at three: “What does ‘but’ mean?” When Rebecca was just four I joined in a game of preserving blueberries, pretending to bottle her little brother. Rebecca: "Ralph’s little boy. You can’t eat boys! Ralph’s a name. You can’t bottle names!” Ultimately when they start to learn to read, the literary language is not foreign but familiar. They might or might not learn to read early. They will learn in their own time, nothing surer, if they have become addicted to story in its printed form. . While they are learning it is vitally important that you continue reading aloud. Remind them constantly why they are going through this difficult process – it’s not so they will get a good job as adults, but because stories are such fun that they desperate to read them themselves. Read them novels and series, and keep reading at least until they can read independently at their interest level. You are giving them a gift – a lifelong passion for stories, and a fascination with words. ----------------------- Virginia kept a record of her son and daughter’s reactions to books from birth to adolescence. Stories, Pictures and Realty: Two children tell is the record of this study up to age eight. She has been helping people write for children for the last twelve years, through Create a Kids’ Book – workshops, writing e-courses, manuscript assessments and a monthly e-bulletin. www.createakidsbook.com.au -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- With the global financial crisis many families will experience high levels of stress. Here in Australia we are lucky at the moment because our economy is in good shape but employment has already fallen slightly and many people feel gloomy about the future. This feeling can lead to stress in the whole family.
Here are some tips:
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The week beginning 20th October was Children’s week in Australia. Many communities organise fun activities for children during this week and the media focuses on these activities at pre-schools, playgroups and schools. It is a good time to put long term plans into action too. Helping children have healthy, happy, safe lives is vital and our government is aware of this. Before the elections there was emphasis on a new, better direction in education, more child care facilities, and paid maternity leave which seems at last to be within sight. With the economic squeeze, plans are being re-thought in many areas. I hope that children’s programs won’t be sidelined. The government has announced that the emergency intervention program in the Northern Territory, started by the previous government, will remain at for least another year. The decision was made because statistics from supermarkets shows that more fruit, vegetables and other healthy food has been purchased under the compulsory income management system. Let us hope that ongoing support will improve health and safety for children and all members of their families. The pre-school years of life are the most important time for a child’s development and by helping parents and grandparents we are helping children. Affordable child care, parent education programs, early intervention, nutrition programs, and libraries are important government initiatives. Communities can do much too to make towns child friendly. Young mothers are often isolated. Help can be given in many ways. Has your community got
Here is a link to a site where you might get ideas on making your community more child friendly www.childfriendly.org.au I have just been sent a link to a new Australian government website for families seeking early learning issues and initiatives. It is at http://mychild.gov.au ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Some years ago I worked in an early intervention unit in a public school. Disabilities ranged from Down’s Syndrome to Autism, from Attention Deficit Disorder to non specific delay. Every child needed an individual program in order to help him /her reach potential. It was interesting work as I had no prior experience of teaching in such a unit, although I had worked with pre-schoolers at a centre where some of the same disabilities were present. Unlike in my former pre-school, there was close contact between staff and parents. Listening to parents was very important. From listening, one got a picture of the pressures in their lives, the emotional drain, and the amount of support needed. Some mothers felt swamped with the level of care they were giving to the disabled child, while still being required to relate to other children in the family. Some partners were very supportive but others escaped into the work force every day, and took little responsibility for the running of the family. In both city and regional areas there is usually a long wait for child assessment or program development by professionals. In regional centres, professionals may not be available at all. G.Ps are overworked and often think that parents are over-reacting to their child. If pressured they may prescribe medication without proper diagnosis and without telling you of the short term and long term effects. It is widely recognized that children need help before five years of age. If you are worried about your child don’t delay and don’t give up.
Help is available for most families. It is a matter of finding and accessing it. La Trobe university will write some special articles about autism in this e-zine. In November I put a late insert into the e-zine about the special study they are undertaking. Perhaps you don’t have a child to take part, or are too far away, but would like information about the study findings. If you are a teacher, this will be an excellent opportunity to learn more. You never know when you will require it. I am repeating their information here: Relationships, social understanding and responsiveness in children with Autism A new study is underway at the Child Development Unit at La Trobe University examining the way children with autism think about their relationships with caregivers, their ability to think from another person’s point of view, and their social and emotional responses to others in social situations. Children who have been diagnosed with Autistic Disorder or Autism Spectrum Disorder aged between 8 to 12 years and who are high functioning with good verbal ability, along with one parent or caregiver, are invited to participate. The testing will take place over two sessions at the Child Development Unit at La Trobe University. The results of the developmental assessment undertaken as part of the study will be available to parents free of charge. If you and your child would like to participate or if you wish to obtain further information about this research, please contact Dr Cheryl Dissanayake at the School of Psychological Science, La Trobe University, Bundoora, 3083 (Tel: 03 9479 1162; email: c.dissanayake@latrobe.edu.au), Ms Felicity Chandler (Tel: 03 9479 2151; email: f.chandler@latrobe.edu.au) or Ms Amanda Newbigin (Tel: 03 9479 2151; email: a.newbigin@latrobe.edu.au). ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- School has begun again and both kids and parents are settling into the new routine. It is often an anxious time especially for those just beginning school, as there are so many unknown factors. Just getting to school can be stressful. Does your child walk, travel on a bus, a train, or go by car? I’m sure you’ll have prepared your child well for this but follow up to see how it is going, especially if you are a working parent and cannot accompany your child to school and collect him/her at the end of the day. Pairing your child with an older one helps build confidence. Have you discussed what to do if something goes wrong? For example who should the child ask for help? Make sure your child knows where to wait for the transport home again and how to recognise the correct bus. Make the beginning of the day calm, not rushed. The night before you can
Parents sometimes worry about whether their child is ready for school. The age of five doesn’t automatically mean a child is mature enough. Children who are shy and find difficulty in mixing with their peers may be better starting school later. Here are some things a school ready-child should be able to do:
Children beginning pre-school or Day Care may be very excited about the prospect but when they get there and see the crowd of unknown children their confidence may wilt. Orientation days usually minimize this as a parent can stay as long as necessary. Make sure your child has something familiar to take to the centre. Explain what time you’ll be back and be early or on time. Talk to a member of staff about your child’s day and encourage your little one to point out a friend and show you something at the centre. We are lucky in Australia that in the early years the emphasis at school is on fun not on academic achievement. Children learn best when they are not pushed. You will be surprised what they learn in a play atmosphere. Play not pressure makes learning exciting ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ January was not a good month concerning accidents and young children. Dogs were responsible for the death of one three year old girl and the severe mauling of her sister. Two other children were bitten by snakes, fortunately not fatally. Children need to be continually reminded about the dangers dogs pose. Dogs can act unpredictably especially when not used to the noise and quick movements of children. Children should never be left alone with them. Snakes are around all year but are more likely to be out in hot weather. They are not easy to see and if you are going to the bush or living in a bush area, the children’s play area should be inspected each day. A healthy respect for snakes should be taught to children from an early age, so that they know what to do if they see a one. Avoid frightening your child so much that he or she avoids the outdoors, however. All adults should know what to do in the event of snake bite. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The Autism Project Article 1 Professor Sally Rogers introduces the Early Start Denver Model to Australia Young children learn as much and as fast as they do because their experiences in the world are “scaffolded” by the important people in their lives. Autism impedes this process. Children with autism
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learning opportunities through watching Since interactions are a primary learning opportunity for infants and toddlers, fewer interactions mean fewer learning opportunities. Early Intervention is vital to overcome these issues. Sally Rogers is a Developmental Psychologist and a Professor of Psychiatry at the M.I.N.D Institute, University of California Davis where she specialises in conducting research into autism and other developmental disorders, especially involving very young children and their families. Professor Rogers is the principal investigator of one of the new NIMH/NICHD Autism Centers of Excellence network projects studying treatment of infants and toddlers with autism. (NIMH - National Institute of Mental Health NICHD - National Institute of Child Health and Development, both USA bodies). Autism Article 2 Dr Cheryl Dissanayake writes Words can be powerful. Discriminatory language when referring to children with disabilities such as Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) can be derogatory, depersonalising, stereotyping and risks emphasising the disability rather than the child. Often children with Autism Spectrum Disorders are referred to collectively as autistics, autistic children, the disabled, the handicapped, the mentally retarded, etc. These terms are depersonalising. The following terms are generally preferred as they recognise that the disability is only one characteristic of the child or children:
Focus on the child, not the disability. Put the child first and the disability second. The use of imprecise terms such as 'challenged', 'differently abled', and other euphemisms are strongly discouraged. The portrayal of children with Autism Spectrum Disorders as helpless, mindless, or suffering has led and continues to lead to discriminatory treatment. People with Autism Spectrum Disorders, of all ages, should be portrayed in a positive manner. Children with ASD have a variety of qualities. This does not mean that a child's ASD should be hidden, ignored or seen as irrelevant, but not be the focus. Do not imply that children with ASD are to be pitied, feared or ignored, or that they are somehow heroic, courageous, patient or 'special'. Avoid using 'normal' or 'able-bodied' in contrast. Never use the terms 'victim' or 'sufferer'. These terms emphasise powerlessness. These children only suffer if you make their disability a handicap. Dr Cheryl Dissanayake Director & Associate Professor Olga Tennison Autism Research Centre http://www.latrobe.edu.au/otarc/rogersforum/index.html --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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